Eh

It’s snowing outsde. I’m under my heated blanket. No one else is home. I’m supposed to go out with a friend in two hours. I need to be showering and getting dressed. But I’m not. I feel the need to write something first because I’ve done absolutely nothing with this day. 

I woke up and scrolled on my phone. I made myself a peanut butter and jelly sandwhich because it was the healthliest thing that I could make with the littlest effort. I poured water into my steadily dying keurig and hoped that it would give me some coffee, the one thing it was put on this measly earth to do. Lately it’s just been making a whole bunch of grinding noises, and then almost exploding noises. I heated up some spaghetti and poured some alfredo sauce on it. 

And now I’m sitting here blogging, and the most interesting thing I can think of to write about is my keurig. And alfredo sauce. Freaking alfredo sauce. I expect you guys to sit here and read about sauce. White. Bland. Sauce.

The daily prompt for today is tempted. 

I am tempted to stop writing . I am tempted to quit my job. I am tempted to write out every single opinion I have that might be controversial just so that people will know how I feel. I’m tempted to take the money out of my savings account and buy an unreasonable amount of pull n’ peel twizzlers and windmill cookies and a brand new Anniversary Edition Scrabble and…. and… whatever else fiscally irresponsible people usually spend money on. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

I went out and now I’m back. I got my nose spontaneously pierced. That’s right everyone. I’m an adult and that means I’m allowed to poke holes in my body whenever I please. It’s obviously the best use of my money and freedom. 

Temptation. Right. 

At the moment I feel peaceful. I’m cuddled up next to my boyfriend. He’s playing PS4 and I’m trying to finish this post. 

There was one point in my life where I just gave in to all temptation because why not. It wouldn’t kill me. Right?

And it didn’t. I even grew as a person. I definitely wouldn’t suggest that to everyone, but for me personally it was a necessary part of adulthood. I regret a lot of it. 

Wanna hear something juicy?

One time, I ate six drumsticks in a row and got a massive stomachache. 

I know. What an awful person I am. It was tough, and my morals were tested. But I came out a stronger woman. 

I don’t really have any unique thoughts about temptation, nothing mindblowingly original. 

A few years ago I read a book called The Picture of Dorian Gray. In the book Gray sells his soul in exchange for everlasting youth. Instead, a portrait of him is the thing that ages, and it captures the ugliness of all his sins. 

“The only way to get rid of temptation is to yield to it. Resist it and your soul grows sick with longing for the things it has forbidden to itself, with desire for what its monstrous laws have made monstrous and unlawful.”

I don’t think selfishness is all we are. It’s not the only thing that makes us human. 

But what do I know. I’m amazingly selfish. I shouldn’t be talking about human kinds ability to rise above when I lose that battle far too often. 

Ocassionally I resist the urge to eat my whole sub because I want to save some for my boyfriend to enjoy.

Small victories, right?

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